How to Put Yourself Out There

I have always been pretty good at making friends. In high school and college, I always had a conglomerate of friends between track/cross country, classes, camp, my Israel trip, sorority, teaching, friends of friends, you get it. It was always easy because most of the people were simply, there.

Now I've moved and I'm essentially starting fresh. It's neat because I have the chance to really meet some cool and interesting people, but it's also intimidating at the same time!

After being here for going on three weeks, there are a few things I have learned (ok, accepted) about "putting yourself out there." These won't necessarily lead to making life-long friends. However, until you can find "your people" these are some reminders for myself that I think are pretty helpful in transitioning to a new place.

In The South, people are much friendlier. 

Gone are the days of ignoring people at 7AM while walking the dog. You need to walk out the door ready to greet others, because people will definitely be greeting you! These aren't "friends," but they are kind people who will make your day a little brighter.

It's OK to "awkwardly" insert yourself into a conversation 

So long as it's appropriate, insert away! Hear someone talking about a great restaurant before barre class starts? Ask them about it! Hear that someone needs a break from the kids and you're a teacher/babysitter? Say so! People receive you a lot better than you think. On a similar note, it's not strange to talk to someone while waiting to check out at the supermarket. Commenting on the weather will shockingly lead to a conversation in The South, but in other places to... assuming you're anywhere South of DC ;)

Show up to events in your area

Charity events, concerts in the park, Meetup groups, and cooking classes are all great ways to meet people. You may not feel comfortable just talking to people right away, but you never know who will sit next to you or comment on your outfit, or notice you're new! Remember what I said about "awkwardly" inserting yourself in a conversation? It's a start!

You will not make friends sitting in your apartment

This sounds obvious, but the number of times I have had to remind myself this. Whew! It's important to acknowledge that while real friends take time, it will take much longer if you only stay in watching Netflix and talking to friends from home. Stay in touch and do it often, but call them after you've gone out and tried something new. Similarly, you will not make friends sitting on your phone out at a event. Share all of your good times once the event is over.

Smile!

This is probably the most important. You're new and no one else knows you yet. Even if you have a neutral to intense resting face, give yourself the best natural smile possible when walking around. You never know who will choose to speak to you!

Yours,

Becky